Remember that Winnie chick from "The Wonder Years"? Well, she's all grown up now and wouldn't Kevin Arnold be disappointed to see her end up in this dreck. In what I believe was meant to be a horror-comedy hybrid (can't be sure if the humor was intentional or unintentional), the movie seriously lacks in both the horror or the comedy. I so wanted to like this movie, but alas, it was not to be. The film is called "HACK!" but a more appropriate title would've been "CLICHE!".

The movie does begin promisingly, with Kane (Jason Voorhees) Hodder running frantically through the forest from an unseen assailant. I was excited to see this icon of horror onscreen and it gave me hope for what was in store. Sadly, the rest of the movie was....lackluster at best. Following the strong opening things dull up quickly as we are introduced to characters that are so cliche'd, so typical of this genre, that I realized that this was a failed attempt to spoof the genre. We have the smart (gay) Asian kid, the sweet virginal hottie, the funny black guy, the football-carrying jock, the foreign exchange student.....etc. etc. Oh god, why?? WHY?? Even worse, some of these characters in the movie are named after some of the biggest names in the genre: Argento, Roth, King. See what they did there? The filmmakers were giving a tip of the hat to the people who make this genre great, but it's just so contrived and silly that it drew me out of the movie and had me rolling my eyes.

So's anyway, these kids and their teacher head to an island for a field trip and end up staying at the home of a movie-obsessed couple. Soon, the bodies start droppin' and our cast is killed off in ways inspired from classic horror flicks. Chainsaw Massacre, The Ring, and, I think, Killer Klowns From Outer Space are just a few of the flicks that are "paid homage" (ahem) to.

Listen, I really did wanna like this movie. But it became impossible to enjoy it once the kids hit the island. It was just so.....so....goofy! Plus, the editing was just not that great, with scenes that seemed to linger on far after the actors were finished with their dialogue. And the music...oh, god, the music was so inappropriate. The reggae/rap music that popped up a couple of times in the movie was so out of place it was ridiculous. And the acting....well, some excel, others fall flat on their faces. I don't know how else to explain it. It's just a mixed bag when it comes to the acting.

The gore is decent, and some of the kills, while ripped off from much better films, are fun. But the plot is so played out, as in you've seen it a million times over and a million times better. And the "big twist"...well, if you don't have it figured out by the time of the reveal, then you really don't know your movies. I saw it coming a mile away and so will you.

It did have a fun appearance by William Forsythe, but honestly it was such an unnecessary character. He did liven things up a bit when he was onscreen and his delivery was really good. He's the highlight of the flick.

As for the aforementioned Winnie from the "Wonder Years", Danica McKellar has grown into a very beautiful woman and the gal can act, but sadly this movie didn't give her a whole lot to work with. Hopefully she'll continue to find work in the horror genre, because she seems to be a good fit.

As for the writer/director Matt Flynn.....I'm not gonna come down hard on him because there is no need to. The movie is what it is, and his was a noble attempt. Unfortunately it just didn't do it for me. I can see that he certainly has some talent so hopefully his next effort will be more successful. I just didn't care much for this one. Hey, like they say: opinions are like assholes.......but I think that this movie will be poor received by the fans who this film was obviously made for.

"HACK!" just didn't impress me. If you absolutely must see this film (all you Forsythe fans out there will get a kick out of him), don't say you weren't warned: it's not as clever as it thinks it is.